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This Year's Model

by Scott Gesser

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1.
Putting all my mental notes inside this giant book I wrote It's backwards but it's not the one you read (Or had a dialogue) And in a pinch I might pluck out the verse That could reverse this awful curse When all my other plans are left for dead (The highest shelves in Prague and) I don't care what's wrong, too much to think about anyway I don't mind the times when things get harder than hard to take But I don't know when this trend's gonna end Having to spend my day as my own best friend I will rock you like a baby tonight Searching all my life to find it's not the one that I designed But there's a million others left to see (You're trying to freak me out now) I fell in love a while back but I didn't know how to react So I sat back and pretended you were me (That's not what it's about and) I don't care, I don't mind I don't know where to spend all this Yen 'Cause all the gadgets in my dreams won't let this thing end
2.
I gotta hold on tight to what I believe in Strap it into a rocket Send it hurdling toward the furthest reaches Store it somewhere safe where only I can find it 'Cause I can only call on the rest if it fails When I call in the night, please, someone help me And it breaks my heart to see myself this way Yes it does I only hope to mend myself 'cause I love me I only look out for myself No mothers, exes, lot of verbs to take But behind my sheik veneer I know that all I'm good at being is fake When I finally look in my eyes and I see there's no one there Well maybe I can look to the sky And the stars will guide me to where I'm supposed to be 'Cause I know there's something better there for me I gotta float away from what I believe in Send it running for the hills If I'm ever gonna live as something more than a rusty man There's something to be said for the worry I hold when a loved one cries And when I can't react to it You know a piece of me up and dies
3.
Hit Single 02:57
When you came back it was like a Chinese democracy Each of them waiting on bended knee Just primed to attack Nothing like the thrill of the chase for the men You can't go home again When you get around Just collecting the victims to hunt you down They're embittered, elated to find themselves with a bitter sound Everybody's thinking 'bout you, everybody's talking 'bout you Everybody knows that you're a hit when you're single Everybody's fighting for you, trying to look inviting When you're dating you're all right But you're a hit when you're single How many hearts do you have to break until you're satisfied? It's not like you haven't tried You're falling apart, but it's cool when you speak And you turn up the charm for the thing hanging on your arm The ones that you've met Haven't been suitable enough to suit you yet Your proud reflection gazing back At your crow's feet and cigarette Everybody's watching for you, everybody's waiting for you Everybody knows that you're a hit when you're single Everyone's complaining 'cause their prospects are all draining 'Til you lose the ball and chain 'Cause you're a hit when you're single I don't believe in your wonderment, just like I don't believe in you But you've still got work to do If I had to show you that there are still other ways to go I'd spend three minutes telling you everything you already know Everyone's on fire for you, trying to take you higher You'll go to the greatest buyer, you're a hit when you're single Everybody's thinking 'bout you, everybody's talking 'bout you Everybody knows that you're a hit when you're single
4.
If you were a boxer, I'd be your corner man I'd fight for your honor if you ever went down But all of the others flash glances of betrayal They'd string me up sideways to spin me around And mother would say you've been warned 'Cause we'd only end up locking horns And the truth looks a little less tainted Depending on the color you paint it Collecting your allies and friends With the urgency of a shattered spy Whose mission entirely depends On living so full without knowing why If I were a captain of industrial ships That powered the world the world like a crude rubber ball Would you find it vital to stand in my shadow When I am the man in control of it all? And how you would cringe and distort When my résumé turned out to be forged And the game that enveloped you in it Now cheapened with each passing minute It's easy to make yourself feel an emotion that's never been real If you're pulling yourself northward just going off a star You'll think that you're northward wherever you are Collecting your allies and friends With the urgency of a shattered spy But here's where our little dance ends 'Cause I can't be full without knowing why
5.
I'd trade the world for just the rush that I'd be given If you'd remember what I said, whatever I said Hand to god, I'd never met you before But you still spend your whole day Just running through my head We would never have made it this way We would never have stayed out this late I carry on these conversations in my sleep Just to hear your invented little voice I break the spine of the rule book from time to time As if I ever had an inkling of a choice We would never have waited this date We would never have made this mistake Kill the lights now And you are the only one left in the spotlight And unbearable resemblance to yourself And all that I can do is telescope my voice to you And wait and pray for word that you might need a little help Just the way that I do whenever I'm alone Hanging by a thinning thread here in a spotlight of my own You kill the lights now and tell me it's not scary When you're forced into a corner With the boy you have to carry on I'm not so great when it comes to making introductions And I'm sorry for when I fall flat on my face It's just defensive with a pinch of lack thereof That feels so free to come along and put me in my place We would never have broken this day We would never have made our escape We would never have made it this way, no With forever left out in our wake
6.
I kicked around an idea for a minute But then I lost it and it might have been on purpose The prospect of being reprehensible for anything The thought of being a grown-up Makes me seven kinds of nervous And I know that I've thought of jumping ship But with her in my hair I might just give those fears the slip I stumbled 'round in a gallery full of people And I couldn't match any of the faces to their names And soon enough they all began to blur together My mind as blank as all their images became And I know that I've caved a million times But with her in my skin I could remember all my lines I fell into a secret compartment in a bathroom Just filled up with mystery and intrigue and the like If life is eggshell white then I am just a bounty Of grass and dirt and wine just waiting for the chance to strike And I know that I've overfilled my cup But with her in my dreams I'm almost sick of giving up
7.
What A Mess 04:48
What a mess you've made of yourself, son What a mess you've made of yourself, my son When you were only eight You didn't seem to want to make a mistake What a mess you've made of yourself, son What a mess you've made of your life, son What a mess you've made of your life, my son When you were only eight, you only wanted to concentrate And what a mess you've made of your life, son And God said to Abraham, "Hey buddy, you do the math" But Abe was trying with all his might Just to keep on going along the beaten path The elevator filled up with your plans will forever fly up and down But it's a matter of time before it's buried in the ground What a mess you've made of your world, son What a mess you've made of your world, my son I remember you were only eight You thought you'd already sealed your fate And what a mess you've made of your world, my son And God broke the barriers And he reached down and picked you up And you stared right into his face With a grin that cried that you didn't really give a fuck The accusations fly like the fur Of the stone-faced men who didn't learn how to love 'Cause, well, the tough take off when the going gets tough And you never wanted something more to live beyond When you learned to open your shell And you never asked for your time in the blue To come to a screeching halt But the doors swung open and you let yourself inside Of your own private hell And God took the implements And he boiled you down to a batter And unless you can take back all these years You'll be out on your own and served on a platter There go your hopes and dreams Only to be drowned in a sea of ignorant fear Because the truth of the matter Is that the truth of the matter never completely comes out clear And God said to Abraham, "Hey buddy, you do the math" But Abe was trying with all that he had Just to keep his ass dragging along the beaten path The elevator filled up with your plans will forever fly up and down But it's a matter of time before it's buried in the ground
8.
All Day Long 03:45
All day long, it's the same old story And all day long, it's the same old song You lie about being faithful And other things that aren't easily explained And I can't help but turn away from This moment in time in a circular vein And the confusion in mind tries to pull me aside To ask why you'd come back just to turn and leave me behind And you lie when you say you're in trouble But I'm not so sure that you didn't snag your own foot And I would love to shake the eight ball And watch it come back with a less hazy outlook But the next time you shock with that same double talk Well I'll play it off like it's already played off The last bastion of truth as a favor to you But as far as I care, you've got everything left to prove
9.
The clock hand is so high up off the ground And so we always try to pull it down But to set off all the wishes that come true When you're not paying attention Is to roll the dice and pay the price For something I won't even mention When the humor sweats your mind And you're having a good time Wouldn't you pretend you're blind? And when the human swears, "You're mine" And I'm running out of time If I could do it all again, I would give it a nine out of ten The years slip by so fast and no one knows To focus on the past now only shows That we're all frustrated animals incapable of being rational Selling ourselves to ourselves and trying to go international I could have tried to save the world I could have tried to get the girl But there's no use trying to pretend 'Cause when the clock stops running, I can't extend it When the humor sweats your mind And you're having a good time Wouldn't you pretend you're blind? And when the human swears, "You're mine" And I'm running out of time Well I could be feeling fine
10.
Catapult 02:37
Tied to a chair on my wedding day The conductor forces the band to play Whatever my captor will allow as it gets hard to breathe To a somebody's vows and I will not believe You'd fall out of love with me Playing Old Maid with the prison guard My hand shakes a bit as I deal the cards The coffee, it burns my throat I offer up a silent wince Even when I learn, I remain unconvinced Remember the time I dreamt of the future? Now I only recall dwelling on the past I hope one day we can keep tabs and hear that longing sound It won't seem so bad the next time around when You will fall out of love with me

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released January 13, 2009

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Scott Gesser Phoenix, Arizona

I'm the guy who records all of this.

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