There was a girl in the 40's
Who lived in Amsterdam with her family
She used to hide from the Nazis
And wrote down all of her thoughts in a diary
Then sometime after she died
Somebody found the house where she used to hide
He said, "I'll publish this book far and wide
And maybe I'll make a little cash on the side"
He's the biggest asshole ever, biggest asshole ever
He's probably insanely rich
But he's mostly just a fucking bitch
The biggest asshole ever
Yeah, that guy's a cunt
There was this guy named Charles Manson
Started a family, they all thought he was handsome
And since he killed lots of people
It wouldn't be a stretch to say that he's evil
He followed Scientology on a whim
But quit because he said it was too crazy for him
Meanwhile, L. Ron Hubbard was collecting his checks
And a few decades later, he brainwashed Beck
He's the biggest asshole ever, biggest asshole ever
I don't give a shit what you're trying to do
The jerk store called and they're out of you
The biggest asshole ever
I hope his kids get AIDS
Shakespeare wrote a lot of good sonnets
But he slit all of his characters' throats
The king of Spain threw his wealth at Columbus
But he couldn't fucking pilot a boat
Dr. Phil, talking out of his sphincter
Doesn't know a Goddamn thing about health
Mel Gibson is an asshole and he's also a dick
So he can literally go fuck himself
Yeah, he can fuck himself
There are so many tragedies
And they get cheapened by stupid songs like these
I'm almost like a parasitic disease
But I don't really care as long as you buy my CDs
I'm the biggest asshole ever, biggest asshole ever
The worst thing you can be by far
Is a douche bag with an acoustic guitar
So I'm the biggest asshole ever
And you can suck my balls
Tom Snowden, from Alice Springs, Australia, turns in six soft, Arthur Russell-y covers of favorites from Björk, Kylie Minogue, and more. Bandcamp New & Notable Oct 11, 2020
Recorded on the Grecian isle of Hydra, this is blissed-out psych pop with stacked falsetto harmonies and luscious arrangements. Bandcamp New & Notable Apr 9, 2023
Two dozen 12-string acoustic improvisations that feel undeniably haunting, like lost transmissions from ancient Appalachia, rediscovered. Bandcamp New & Notable Oct 17, 2022